Friday, March 02, 2007


No Sex? The Grand Ayatollah says "Beat Her Up!"

Just another example of how, in Islam, State and Religion are united together with less than auspicious results.

Is there a ‘Dear Abby' syndicated newspaper column in Iran?

Well, not quite - but there is Grand Ayatollah Naser Makarem-Shirazi willing to dispense his advices on the Iranian population and anyone else willing to listen through his website with URL at, particularly on such delicate matters as conjugal relationships.

Because State and Religion are one and only, for centuries Muslims have developed ways to integrate religious beliefs with the external socio-economic realities of the nations they lived in. This has had varying degrees of compatibility with the empires and customs they encountered.

Speaking of external socio-economic realities, for instance, Grand Ayatollah Naser Makarem-Shirazi who so happens to be the spiritual guide for many shi'a teens, and the person in charge of spreading the regime's views on such philosophical matters as ethics and morality, as well as guiding the young through the precepts of general education, has now offered is views on the relationship between the sexes. His website is one of the regime's most authoritative channels and, because of this, it is translated in various languages including English. Grand Ayatollah Naser Makarem-Shirazi has spoken specifically on the relationship between husband and wife in the matter of conjugal sex - or lack thereof - in unambiguous terms: "Women's corporal punishment is like performing necessary surgery on a patient".

The Al-Qu'ran, professes the Grand Ayatollah, permits to inflict corporal punishment on a woman if she refuses to perform her marital duties in the bedroom. "There is no doubt that Islam has bestowed valuable services on women in society, and that they [the women] owe a debt of gratitude [to Islam] to that end". In fact, continues the Grand Ayatollah, even those Western writers who do not have a positive regard for Islam such as Crane Brinton, John Christopher and Robert Lee Wolff in their book History of the Western Civilization And Its Fundamentals In The East frankly admit that the Islamic movement has helped to improve the status of women.

But as much as the teachings of Islam contain all this great emphasis on the nature of kindness to women and, in fact, stress that one should not be unpleasant towards them "women are also obliged to treat their husbands with kindness". Specifically as it relates to the matter of corporal punishment where women refuse to perform their marital duties in the bedroom, the Al-Qu'ran clearly commands that the husband must first try to resolve the problem through counselling and guidance, followed by the non-sharing of the matrimonial bed. If, however, after a while all this is not effective then "he can beat her a little", says the Grand Ayatollah.

Of course, continues the shi'a clergyman, this issue is a totally exceptional situation and in fact should be regarded as "performing necessary surgery on a patient". When the wife refuses to live up to her matrimonial duties and the only way to persuade her is to inflict corporal punishment, but the husband refuses to do so, then the Islamic regime is authorized to inflict such corporal punishment on her on behalf of the husband, and with or without his explicit consent, "for her own good".

In fact Grand Ayatollah Naser Makarem-Shirazi, moreover, goes one step further and delves his expert opinion and renders his erudite understanding of psychological tenets as well by declaring: "It is important to emphasize that according to various psychologists some women are masochists and enjoy being harmed, and sometimes that is intensified in the form of a mental health crisis, in which case corporal punishment can be an effective 'spiritual relief'. To this end, of course, it is important that the punishment should not be such that it leaves scars or permanent injuries", but it is acceptable if the body turns 'mildly' black and blue.

So therefore, if you are experiencing matrimonial woes or, better still, if you are trying to conquer the heart and mind of the lady of your dreams and would like to submit a ‘Dear Abby'-style question to Grand Ayatollah Naser Makarem-Shirazi, feel free to send an e-mail to makarem@www.makaremshirazi. Results are guaranteed.

In light of his profound knowledge and professional expertise in the matters of human nature and relations between the sexes, perhaps one day the Grand Ayatollah will consider setting up an 800-number.

Grand Ayatollah Naser Makarem-Shirazi is one of the most important and influential clergymen in Iran today. He has been appointed to his post by the regime for, among other things, "having completed his religious and seminary studies in four years time, when it usually takes twelve to fifteen years", says the biography of the website.

Hummh ... He must have skipped a few chapters ...

Luigi Frascati

Real Estate Chronicle


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